.reality.

i wish i didn’t take it all so seriously
but triviality was never for me
what i crave is real
and it exists
somewhere just beyond my reach
but who knows
maybe it’s all imaginary
in reality

.feeling.

there’s this feeling i get
when i look at the sun
or the moon
the mountains across the lake
the light on your face
there’s this feeling i get
when i share something about myself
or know that i am understood
accomplish something great
hear you say my name
each moment is different
yet somehow
the same
i have a lot of feelings
because i feel everything

.light.

morning and i’m awake and panicked
night and i am drained
sleep
feels like a language that is dead
not romantic, but full of dread
the in between is suffocation
no escape
no memory
of why i thought it better to stay than go
who am i doing this for
it can’t be me because
im not here
im not here
im not here
i can’t be here
i don’t want to be here
i don’t want to be here or there or anywhere
it’s dark here…
there…
everywhere…
i can’t find the switch
did you lie?
is there even a light?